I Hate the Beach

Debbies in their French bikinis
strut around like a bunch of whores.
Rich old bastards drink martinis
in their condos by the shores.
I hate the beach.

Fat man in the sun gets dizzy,
falls in the water and promptly drowns.
Lifeguards' busy watching debbies,
and acting like a bunch of clowns.
I hate the beach.

I hate the sand
and I hate the trash.
I'd like to strangle half the debbies.
(get your fuckin' hands off my towel you jerk)

Surf punks trying to cut me up
and hippies trying to sell me grass
Mormons trying to convert me
and all the hookers want my ass.
I hate the beach.

I hate the trash
and I hate sunburn.
I'd like to drown all the fucking tourists.
Why don't you go back to Wisconsin, where you belong.

I hate the beach.
I hate the beach.
I hate the beach.
I hate the beach.
Wipeout.

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I Hate the Beach is copyright © 1994 Liberal Materialists Music

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